My Momma Told Me...

c2011Shalako


My Momma told me there would be days like this.

Last month I sold about twelve or thirteen books and one short story. I have a dark sort of a poem coming out in the next few months, and a science-fiction parody sort of a story story coming out at the end of the month.

That story is with Bewildering Tales, and they have another one coming up as well, but I don't know when. I've got one or two pretty good submissions out there, but I haven't heard anything back. I've got a few other subs out there too. I haven't heard anything from them either.

Those guys are probably wading knee-deep through the sluch pile, and they will get to mine sooner or later! And they have another room full of slush-pile queries.

Okay, so the big challenge is to find a place to live, which would be easier if I had first and last month's rent. All I can do is to stall for time and think well. If I'm going to end up in a one-bedroom apartment, either the cat gets fixed (or what?) and that's probably another three hundred fifty I don't have either.

Should I sign a lease, or just 'pay as you go?' Allegedly my number for housing comes up in September, but they told me 'May or June' just last March. I got that in writing, ladies and gentlemen. The lady on the phone says, 'Let us know where you are.'

I don't know what to do for the next four or five months...

What do I tell any potential landlord?

"As a former homeowner, I don't actually have any references...is there some way I can put this on my credit card?"

This morning I woke up just absolutely brimming over with agression.

That says one thing, and one thing only, ladies and gentlemen: insecurity.