Friday, March 15, 2013

The Hive Mind.


Rosse1954





(In which the internationally-renowned science-fiction writer with a pretty good little cult following Mr. Louis B. Shalako makes the case for a bailout of the disabled to the rather unsavoury Standing Committee on Budget and Financial Matters, or; ‘the undesirables in pursuit of the unspeakable.’)

The disabled, the mentally ill, the permanently unemployable, need to raise their expectations.

As long as we are satisfied with mere subsistence, then that’s all we’re going to get.

The reason the government can’t give the disabled a five percent increase in their pensions for five years in a row, is because they’re afraid we might become radicalized by the internet. But, luckily, we can’t even afford it! So their fears are groundless and irrational. The people in charge of our society honestly believe that they need to keep poverty around for some reason. I think it has something to do with their quest for achieving the highest possible social status. They enjoy the competition. Funny thing is, most of them are crappy writers.

I like to think that our society has a kind of collective consciousness. It’s kind of like a bee hive. It seems to me that by pursuing our own enlightened self-interest, our actions also work to the common benefit of all. The person who operates heavy equipment on a road-building project does more than earn a pay-cheque and feed a family, and help provide them with a home, heat, hydro, clothing, and education. The fulfillment of their private needs causes all sorts of spin-off benefits. Building homes, providing shoes or natural gas and other items employs other people, who get to provide homes for their own families. It’s a pretty simple equation: the more good jobs there are, the more good jobs are created in services and production; i.e. ‘manufacturing.’
Whether we like it or not, all social programs rest on some kind of revenue stream, whether it’s
user fees, customs duties, stamps, or taxation in one form or another. Yet the federal and provincial governments have cut personal and corporate income taxes, at the same time they are increasing spending. Here in Ontario, the Liberal government has increased spending about ninety percent over six or seven years. In order to pay for that, you have to have growth in revenues of eight or ten percent to be sustainable. That was before the recession. This left us in a remarkably bad place when the recession hit. They didn’t listen because they couldn’t listen. It wouldn’t have been popular politically to help the disabled. It might have interfered with their chances for reelection. So they chose to cut taxes in an effort to stimulate production of essentially useless luxury consumer goods, so their cronies’ industries could remain profitable.

Yet recessions happen about every ten years, looking back into recent history. One wonders why the bee who was supposed to be specialized, to lead the rest of the colony, was unable to foresee the future in any credible fashion, and was unable to lead in a credible way. What ticks me off is the way I tell the government what I need, and then they go do the opposite. My interests must be contrary to someone else's. Just who exactly is that, anyway?

The provincial economy has doubled in size over the last fifteen years. They couldn’t help the disabled when times were good, and now they can’t do it at all. Social justice is a myth of the middle class, many of whom seem to draw a pay-cheque from the government’s infinite ‘sunshine fund.’ The government should not be the biggest employer, or the loudest self-interest group in town; or always be wearing a mouth-piece.

Mark Oglestharp
Locally we have the Corporation of the City of Sarnia. The provincial government and the federal government are corporate bodies as well. The Romans called it a ‘corpus,’ which means, ‘body,’ for a very good reason. It acts like a body. A body has defenses, and a body will defend itself if threatened. No matter how weak or strong, it will defend itself. The government is a kind of an organism. If you attack one small part of it somewhere, another small part of it somewhere else will step right up and attack you. Because what threatens one part of the body threatens the whole. It doesn’t even need to give out specific
orders, each part is capable of independent actions. The ancient Romans were extremely intelligent, and well educated lawyers, doctors, philosophers, poets, authors, mathematicians, generals, navigators, and engineers. We really shouldn’t ignore the lessons we can learn from them.

While it is true that Mr. Stephen Harper, the Prime Minister, or Mr. Dalton McGuinty, the former premier of the Province of Ontario has his own individual consciousness, he simply cannot direct each and every member of the government and bureaucracy each and every day. Each individual also has an individual consciousness, for they must be able to act independently. Yet they also represent a collective consciousness, one which communicates ‘amongst itself.’

(I tried to brainwash Mr. McGuinty, unfortunately there wasn’t much there to work with.)

This collective consciousness doesn’t take time to inquire into why someone might have attacked it, it merely defends itself instinctively, and for all the normal reasons. It wishes to perpetuate itself. It wants to live. In that sense a government is a kind of artificial intelligence—it has consciousness, it has reason, it has identity, and it seeks to perpetuate itself. It has motivation.

Like ‘Gargantua,’ the remarkably satirical creation of Francois Rabelais, it even eats. It eats money, it eats time, and it eats people. Society also has a kind of collective consciousness, where individual consciousnesses can talk and gossip amongst themselves, and over time public opinion can often come up with a course of action—yet who knows which individual cell originally came up with any given notion, or which individual cell may have modified the message before passing it on to the next cell. Individual cells in organic bodies do that too, for example nerve cells. Glandular cells create hormones, antibodies, etc. The body’s internal communications network is completely subconscious in the human being.

If you think about it, these individual consciousnesses must obey certain laws, or entropy, a state of increasing disorder, would set in and the whole system would break down. You could describe entropy as an energy loss due to internal friction. In the human body, our cells totally replace themselves about every seven years. We do not wait seven years and then change all of our cells at once. We just do so many cells a day for seven years. Yet at the end of that time, we are all new people, aren’t we? Society is like that too—it replaces individual cells over time until all of them have been renewed.

Individual cells die, but society persists, because it has evolved to persist. The trouble with the disabled is that we won’t die. We are the undead.

Viruses have no higher consciousness, or awareness of other viruses, unlike human beings.

They simply infiltrate, penetrate, and replicate. They have no idea they are part of a colony.

They may look like one to an outside observer, they may act like one, and have the effects of one. They do act together. There are no individual viruses which specialize in one job or another—they all have the same job. But given time, a single virus will create a colony of like-minded individuals.

Bees do specialize. They live in colonies, they communicate with one another, and they are aware of one another. They have a colony, and they behave like one. Bees have a kind of individual as well as a kind of collective consciousness lacking in viruses. Among the animal kingdom, non-linguistic communication dominates, as anyone who has seen a thick flock of blackbirds maneuvering as if they had one mind will agree.

And I don’t call myself a philosopher for nothing.

My new theory goes something like this. If society has a collective consciousness, and if it does somehow communicate ideas through the whole, ‘body-politic,’ then maybe, just maybe, I could learn how to talk to it. It is a strange kind of animal, I admit that—but I’m good with animals. I figure the government just needs a little obedience training, and maybe the middle class just needs its nose rubbed in it once in a while.

My new plan goes something like this. If every disabled person were to apply for geared-to-income housing, and get their eyes checked, and get their teeth all fixed up, and go to the doctor’s and see if there was anything wrong with them, and then get the scrip, which after all costs only two dollars. You don’t even have to take them if you don’t want to—you can dump them down the toilet, who’s going to know? As long as they’re expensive, see, that’s the key. If every disabled person applied for the Special Needs Diet Allowance, or asked a social worker about going to college and learning two or three languages so they could become a translator, then someone would have to listen…someone somewhere would have to listen. Some fuckin’ asshole somewhere would have to listen, right?

It seems to me that we have to make it more expensive for society to keep us at home, (or in a jail,) than it would be to provide a few little employment incentives for the employers and a few little supports for the employees. This might actually benefit society in the long run. At some point if the disabled could build a little wealth, and maybe even get ahead of the game, they might be able to contribute to the tax base. They might be able to rent apartments on their own, and a lucky few might even own a home someday.

If a disabled person could earn $12,000 a year, and keep their $12,000 a year ODSP pension, then that would put them substantially over the poverty line. They wouldn’t need geared-to-income housing, and they wouldn’t need food banks. They could actually live in dignity and in a state of real independence. Very few employers are willing to hire a relatively-unskilled and inexperienced disabled person for $24,000 a year, but they might grab one for $12,000 a year, especially if the provincial and federal governments coughed up three or four grand of that.

Oh, and $24,000 a year results in a taxable income—which must be of some benefit to Canadian society. The God-damned taxpayers might even get some of that money back for a change.

The disabled did not cause the recession. We didn’t have the power to do that. The middle class is the engine that drives our economy. The middle class is the government, for the majority rules, even though groupthink is about as ignorant as a mob’s opinion.

“The government is the economy.” This is a direct quote from Frank Herbert’s Dune. A science-fiction writer has to be aware of history, and he must be adept at peering into the future.

The key thing is to free ourselves from that hive mentality, and to rise above it.



Wednesday, March 13, 2013

Newfie Vision Quest.

Photo: P199


Ronny Flames! You guys remember Ronny, we used to call him Stinky back then. The town was so small that everybody knew everybody else’s business. When the rich guy flushed his toilet, we all knew what he had for dinner. (Rich guys all live on hills.) I saw Ronny recently. He was walking down the highway with his suitcase. He thinks no one knows about the miniature crossbow in there. He’s probably going for squirrels and pigeons. He usually has a bag of popcorn or something for bait.

“You got to have a system,” according to Ronny.

We had to share our horse with the next town. The streetlights used to go dim when we plugged in an electric shaver. No one was from that town, officially—we all came from somewhere else.

Ronny, yeah, I counseled him at the Community Centre. Arrested juvenile development.

Mind of a fourteen-year-old, but it's okay, he likes older women—about sixteen.

Anal retentive with displaced Oedipus complex—careful how you say that, or the cruelty to animals people will be all over you—and hebephrenic tendencies, narcissistic rage, the whole schlemiel. I think he wanted a pension or something.

Turned him down, they did.

“You’re literate,” they said.

“Literate! Schmitterate!” That’s all I can say.

He got all them holes in his forehead learning to eat with a fork. Don’t know if you knew that.

Oh, yeah, and don’t ever trust the little bugger. He’s the kind of guy that removes the drawstring from your pajamas then pulls the fire alarm. I won’t say he was a gay baby…but you should have heard him howl when they pulled the pacifier out of his ass. They gave him the isolation room at the loonie bin. It was his workplace. None of the other employees could stand his incessant chatter.

I’d rather hear him speak than eat—we’ve all heard him eat, right? Ronny mixed up acid with Viagra one night. He and the girlfriend spent the evening making love on the ceiling (to hear him tell it.) The one time he mixed up the Viagra with the Ex-Lax the poor fellow didn’t know whether he was coming or going! The government gave him Viagra in jail and he got hooked. He finally kicked the habit by getting back on heroin.

One time this nuclear sub went missing, the Americans were going nuts with the aerial searches, stuff like that. Finally found the thing in Ronny’s backyard. He was trying to clean it, but I guess he couldn’t find a spot to get the knife in.

Buggered up his nets something fierce, so he said. The old man and the sea got nothing on Ronny, Hemingway got nothing on Old Ron. His mom was so fat they had to use a bookmark to find her navel. His old man whacked off in a flower pot, raised a bloomin’ idiot, that’s the opinion round here, anyways.

I warned Ronny about them immigrant girls, but no, he had the hots for this one.

Later, he, uh, privately admitted about the stubble on her upper lip.

“By t’under and Jesus!” he said. “I had the nasty feeling that I was grappling with one of me mates!” How in the hell would a man know something like that?

Ronny never listens. We never talk about it. He doesn’t want to be reminded.

Funny thing was, she chewed her arm off…

One night Ronny dreamed he was pinching himself.

“Okay…now what?” That’s what told me the next day.

He ceases to amaze us sometimes. A lot of people think if he had brains he could become dangerous…they think if brains were dynamite, he wouldn’t have enough to blow his nose. Now, he does have a head like a half-chewed caramel, and if I had a face like that I would drown myself in pretty short order. But, he’s not as dumb as be looks, he’s not as stupid as he pretends to be.

He’s got a real brain hidden in there. So brilliant you can’t argue with him. It’s hard to get a word in edgewise.

This one time he was at the track, watching three horses in the semi-private paddock they got there. The first horse says, ‘During my career I won forty per cent of the time,’ and the second horse says, ‘I won two hundred races in three years,’ and the third horse says, ‘I won three and half million for my master,’ and then all of a sudden an old dog laying there in the grass, he says, “When I was into racing in Florida, we used to…”

And all of a sudden Ronny bellows out, ‘Holy shit! A dog that can talk!’ Like he just caught on…what a dingbat. (That was the punch-line. One of the horses was supposed to say it. It just goes to show you, though.)

You got to love Ronny. He’s just like all of us, a maze of contradictions.

Either someone stole his Mojo, or his get up and go had a duty to escape.

He’s like a sooner dog walking with its ass catching up to his head. Haven't seen much of him lately.


Silje L. Bakke.
Maybe he’s on some kind of Newfie vision quest. He’ll stay out until he starts to have visions. When he threatened to run away from home as a child, his mom used to pack him a lunch, give him a hundred bucks, pin a note on his chest that said, ‘Vancouver,’ and shove him out the door.

Can’t say as I blame the poor woman. I would try it myself, but I don’t have the money to get him drunk enough. A two-four would do it. Oh, yeah, and a bus ticket. Lady, if I had that kind of cash I’d be in Vancouver myself.

Before you go, can you spare about nine bucks for a sandwich and a coffee?

Thank you, and you really are a beautiful person.

Monday, March 11, 2013

Stuff I Ain't Got and Still Don't Care.

Mom and I never discussed anything of consequence.
She called me in the car or when I was having a dump.





I know we’re supposed to stay focused on the positive, but I am. Really.

Sometimes it’s important to take a minute and think about what we ain’t got, and I don’t know; maybe even celebrate it a little.

I don’t have a cell phone. Why in the hell would I have a cell phone that I might use once a week? When the only one that ever called me was my mother, usually when I was in the car or taking a dump. We never discussed anything of consequence.

I don’t even know what it costs to run a cell phone these days. I simply don’t care.

I don’t have an alarm clock or a calendar. Think about that one for a while.

I don’t have a laptop, a tablet, an iPad, or an iPod. I never have to lose the charger or the cord, which oddly enough costs as much as the rest of the unit put together—all that copper, apparently. Copper is a precious metal.

The actual phones are mostly silicon and plastic, rubber, and bits of lower priced metals. I don’t have a game-box, neither do I have a big-screen TV with theatre surround sound with enhanced bass.

Vacuum cleaners suck.
I don’t have a vacuum cleaner. Think about that one—I never have to vacuum. I never have to buy bags. First of all, it’s an incentive to take my shoes off when coming in the door, and secondly if the place gets that dirty I’ll just move. Vacuum cleaners suck.

I don’t have a TV. I never have to waste my time complaining about nothing being on TV. I don’t give a shit what’s on TV. If I could order one channel at a time, for fifty cents a month, I might consider it. My total monthly bill would be about $2.50. Otherwise I won’t have it in my house.

I don’t have a stereo, radio, ghetto blaster, CDs, anything like that. When I complain about noise, people always say, “Oh, you’ve got to get a TV or a radio or something in there, then it won’t bother you.”

I’m supposed to replace some other asshole’s noise with my own. That’s about the size of it.

I figure people hear so much noise around them they want to fight back. They want to control something. So they get a radio and try to drown out the annoying noises that all those other people make.

I want to control something too—I want to control how much quiet I got raging in my place.

I like to turn that fuckin’ quiet up all the way. You know?

I don’t have a cat, a dog, a bird, or a fish. I don’t have a snake. I don’t want one. They can go fuck themselves.

This is not me bowling.
I don’t have a criminal record, a tattoo, a drinking problem, a kid, a wife, a girlfriend, a mother-in-law. I don’t have a buddy because I can’t stand losers. I don’t have an ear-ring or a beard. I don’t have or want a pony-tail. I do not have a red hanky tied around my head. So why go there at all?

If you want a friend, buy a good car or a pair of respectable shoes or something. Sooner or later they will let you down, but hopefully you got your money’s worth out of them by then.

I don’t even have a really good suit.

There’s a lot of things I don’t have, a garden, a motorbike, a skidoo, a personal watercraft, a trailer out at the Pinery, a yacht, a jet, a set of night-vision glasses, an Aston-Martin DB-6 and a jet-pack, scuba gear, a Hasselblad, a miracle cure for AIDS, a bowling league night, the list goes on.

And I still don’t care.

(Louis, we're out of beer. - ed.)

Okay, now I care.

END

Photos: Top, Ken Schumin/Zach Vega, middle, Xiaphas, bottom, Che.