The Altar at Midnight
Galaxy Science Fiction, November
1952
Doing something for humanity may be fine—for humanity—but rough on the
individual!
He had quite a rum-blossom on him
for a kid, I thought at first. But when he moved closer to the light by the
cash register to ask the bartender for a match or something, I saw it wasn’t
that. Not just the nose. Broken veins on his cheeks, too, and the funny eyes.
He must have seen me look, because he slid back away from the light.
The bartender shook my bottle of
ale in front of me like a Swiss bell-ringer so it foamed inside the green
glass.
“You ready for another, sir?” he
asked.
I shook my head. Down the bar, he
tried it on the kid—he was drinking scotch and water or something like
that--and found out he could push him around. He sold him three scotch and
waters in ten minutes.
When he tried for number four,
the kid had his courage up and said, “I’ll tell you when I’m ready for another, Jack.” But there wasn’t any trouble.
It was almost nine and the place
began to fill up. The manager, a real hood type, stationed himself by the door
to screen out the high-school kids and give the big hello to conventioneers.
The girls came hurrying in, too, with their little makeup cases and their fancy
hair piled up and their frozen faces with the perfect mouths drawn on them. One
of them stopped to say something to the manager, some excuse about something,
and he said: “That’s aw ri’; get inna dressing room.”
A three-piece band behind the
drapes at the back of the stage began to make warm-up noises and there were two
bartenders keeping busy. Mostly it was beer—a midweek crowd. I finished my ale
and had to wait a couple of minutes before I could get another bottle. The bar
filled up from the end near the stage because all the customers wanted a good,
close look at the strippers for their fifty-cent bottles of beer. But I noticed
that nobody sat down next to the kid, or, if anybody did, he didn’t stay long—you
go out for some fun and the bartender pushes you around and nobody wants to sit
next to you. I picked up my bottle and glass and went down on the stool to his
left.
He turned to me right away and
said: “What kind of a place is this, anyway?” The broken veins were all over
his face, little ones, but so many, so close, that they made his face look
something like marbled rubber. The funny look in his eyes was it—the trick
contact lenses. But I tried not to stare and not to look away.
“It’s okay,” I said. “It’s a good
show if you don’t mind a lot of noise from—”
He stuck a cigarette into his
mouth and poked the pack at me. “I’m a spacer,” he said, interrupting.
I took one of his cigarettes and
said: “Oh.”
He snapped a lighter for the
cigarettes and said: “Venus.”
***
I was noticing that his pack of
cigarettes on the bar had some kind of yellow sticker instead of the blue tax
stamp.
“Ain’t that a crock?” he asked. “You
can’t smoke and they give you lighters for a souvenir. But it’s a good lighter.
On Mars last week, they gave us all some cheap pen-and-pencil sets.”
“You get something every trip,
hah?” I took a good, long drink of ale and he finished his scotch and water.
“Shoot. You call a trip a ‘shoot’.”
One of the girls was working her
way down the bar. She was going to slide onto the empty stool at his right and
give him the business, but she looked at him first and decided not to. She
curled around me and asked if I’d buy her a li’l ole drink. I said no and she
moved on to the next. I could kind of feel the young fellow quivering. When I
looked at him, he stood up. I followed him out of the dump. The manager grinned
without thinking and said, “G’night, boys,” to us.
The kid stopped in the street and
said to me: “You don’t have to follow me around, Pappy.” He sounded like one
wrong word and I would get socked in the teeth.
“Take it easy. I know a place
where they won’t spit in your eye.”
He pulled himself together and
made a joke of it. “This I have to see,” he said. “Near here?”
“A few blocks.”
We started walking. It was a nice
night.
“I don’t know this city at all,”
he said. “I’m from Covington, Kentucky. You do your drinking at home there. We
don’t have places like this.” He meant the whole Skid Row area.
“It’s not so bad,” I said. “I
spend a lot of time here.”
“Is that a fact? I mean, down
home a man your age would likely have a wife and children.”
“I do. The hell with them.”
He laughed like a real youngster
and I figured he couldn’t even be twenty-five. He didn’t have any trouble with
the broken curbstones in spite of his scotch and waters. I asked him about it.
“Sense of balance,” he said. “You
have to be tops for balance to be a spacer—you spend so much time outside in a
suit. People don’t know how much. Punctures. And you aren’t worth a damn if you
lose your point.”
“What’s that mean?”
“Oh. Well, it’s hard to describe.
When you’re outside and you lose your point, it means you’re all mixed up, you
don’t know which way the can—that’s the ship—which way the can is. It’s having
all that room around you. But if you have a good balance, you feel a little
tugging to the ship, or maybe you just know
which way the ship is without feeling it. Then you have your point and you can
get the work done.”
“There must be a lot that’s hard
to describe.”
He thought that might be a crack
and he clammed up on me.
“You call this Gandytown,” I said
after a while. “It’s where the stove-up old railroad men hang out. This is the
place.”
***
It was the second week of the
month, before everybody’s pension check was all gone. Oswiak’s was jumping. The
Grandsons of the Pioneers were on the juke singing the Man from Mars Yodel and
old Paddy Shea was jigging in the middle of the floor. He had a full seidel of
beer in his right hand and his empty left sleeve was flapping.
The kid balked at the screen
door. “Too damn bright,” he said.
I shrugged and went on in and he
followed. We sat down at a table. At Oswiak’s you can drink at the bar if you
want to, but none of the regulars do.
Paddy jigged over and said: “Welcome
home, Doc.” He’s a Liverpool Irishman; they talk like Scots, some say, but they
sound almost like Brooklyn to me.
“Hello, Paddy. I brought somebody
uglier than you. Now what do you say?”
Paddy jigged around the kid in a
half-circle with his sleeve flapping and then flopped into a chair when the
record stopped. He took a big drink from the seidel and said: “Can he do this?”
Paddy stretched his face into an awful grin that showed his teeth. He has three
of them. The kid laughed and asked me: “What the hell did you drag me into here
for?”
“Paddy says he’ll buy drinks for
the house the day anybody uglier than he is comes in.”
Oswiak’s wife waddled over for
the order and the kid asked us what we’d have.
I figured I could start drinking,
so it was three double scotches.
After the second round, Paddy
started blowing about how they took his arm off without any anesthetics except
a bottle of gin because the red-ball freight he was tangled up in couldn’t
wait.
That brought some of the other old
gimps over to the table with their stories.
Blackie Bauer had been sitting in
a boxcar with his legs sticking through the door when the train started with a
jerk. Wham, the door closed. Everybody laughed at Blackie for being that dumb
in the first place, and he got mad.
Sam Fireman has palsy. This week
he was claiming he used to be a watchmaker before he began to shake. The week
before, he’d said he was a brain surgeon. A woman I didn’t know, a real old
Boxcar Bertha, dragged herself over and began some kind of story about how her
sister married a Greek, but she passed out before we found out what happened.
Somebody wanted to know what was
wrong with the kid’s face—Bauer, I think it was, after he came back to the
table.
“Compression and decompression,”
the kid said. “You’re all the time climbing into your suit and out of your
suit. Inboard air’s thin to start with. You get a few redlines--that’s these
ruptured blood vessels—and you say the hell with the money; all you’ll make is
just one more trip. But, God, it’s a lot of money for anybody my age! You keep
saying that until you can’t be anything but a spacer. The eyes are hard-radiation
scars.”
“You like dot all ofer?” asked
Oswiak’s wife politely.
“All over, ma’am,” the kid told
her in a miserable voice. “But I’m going to quit before I get a Bowman Head.”
“I don’t care,” said Maggie
Rorty. “I think he’s cute.”
“Compared with-” Paddy began, but
I kicked him under the table.
***
We sang for a while, and then we
told gags and recited limericks for a while, and I noticed that the kid and
Maggie had wandered into the back room—the one with the latch on the door.
Oswiak’s wife asked me, very
puzzled: “Doc, w’y dey do dot flyink by
planyets?”
“It’s the damn govermint,” Sam
Fireman said.
“Why not?” I said. “They got the
Bowman Drive, why the hell shouldn’t they use it? Serves ‘em right.” I had a
double scotch and added: “Twenty years of it and they found out a few things
they didn’t know. Redlines are only one of them. Twenty years more, maybe they’ll
find out a few more things they didn’t know. Maybe by the time there’s a
bathtub in every American home and an alcoholism clinic in every American town,
they’ll find out a whole lot of
things they didn’t know. And every American boy will be a pop-eyed, blood-raddled
wreck, like our friend here, from riding the Bowman Drive.”
“It’s the damn govermint,” Sam
Fireman repeated.
“And what the hell did you mean
by that remark about alcoholism?” Paddy said, real sore. “Personally, I can
take it or leave it alone.”
So we got to talking about that
and everybody there turned out to be people who could take it or leave it
alone.
***
It was maybe midnight when the
kid showed at the table again, looking kind of dazed. I was drunker than I
ought to be by midnight, so I said I was going for a walk. He tagged along and
we wound up on a bench at Screwball Square. The soap-boxers were still going
strong. Like I said, it was a nice night. After a while, a pot-bellied old
auntie who didn’t give a damn about the face sat down and tried to talk the kid
into going to see some etchings. The kid didn’t get it and I led him over to
hear the soap-boxers before there was trouble.
One of the orators was a
mush-mouthed evangelist. “And, oh, my friends,” he said, “when I looked through
the porthole of the spaceship and beheld the wonder of the Firmament—”
“You’re a stinkin’ Yankee liar!”
the kid yelled at him. “You say one damn more word about can-shootin’ and I’ll
ram your spaceship down your lyin’ throat! Wheah’s your redlines if you’re such
a hot spacer?”
The crowd didn’t know what he was
talking about, but ‘wheah’s your redlines’ sounded good to them, so they
heckled mush-mouth off his box with it.
I got the kid to a bench. The
liquor was working in him all of a sudden.
He simmered down after a while
and asked: “Doc, should I’ve given Miz Rorty some money? I asked her afterward
and she said she’d admire to have something to remember me by, so I gave her my
lighter. She seem’ to be real pleased with it. But I was wondering if maybe I
embarrassed her by asking her right out. Like I tol’ you, back in Covington,
Kentucky, we don’t have places like that. Or maybe we did and I just didn’t
know about them. But what do you think I should’ve done about Miz Rorty?”
“Just what you did,” I told him. “If
they want money, they ask you for it first. Where you staying?”
“Y.M.C.A.,” he said, almost
asleep. “Back in Covington, Kentucky, I was a member of the Y and I kept up my
membership. They have to let me in because I’m a member. Spacers have all kinds
of trouble, Doc. Woman trouble. Hotel trouble. Fam’ly trouble. Religious
trouble. I was raised a Southern Baptist, but wheah’s Heaven, anyway? I ask’
Doctor Chitwood las’ time home before the redlines got so thick—Doc, you aren’t
a minister of the Gospel, are you? I hope I di’n’ say anything to offend you.”
“No offense, son,” I said. “No
offense.”
I walked him to the avenue and
waited for a fleet cab. It was almost five minutes. The independents that roll
drunks dent the fenders of fleet cabs if they show up in Skid Row and then the
fleet drivers have to make reports on their own time to the company. It keeps
them away. But I got one and dumped the kid in.
“The Y Hotel,” I told the driver.
“Here’s five. Help him in when you get there.”
***
When I walked through Screwball
Square again, some college kids were yelling ‘wheah’s your redlines’ at old
Charlie, the last of the Wobblies.
Old Charlie kept roaring: “The
hell with your breadlines! I’m talking about atomic bombs. Right—up—there!” And he pointed at the Moon.
It was a nice night, but the
liquor was dying in me.
There was a joint around the
corner, so I went in and had a drink to carry me to the club; I had a bottle
there. I got into the first cab that came.
“Athletic Club,” I said.
“Inna dawghouse, harh?” the
driver said, and he gave me a big personality smile.
I didn’t say anything and he
started the car.
He was right, of course. I was in
everybody’s doghouse. Someday I’d scare hell out of Tom and Lise by going home
and showing them what their daddy looked like.
Down at the Institute, I was in
the doghouse.
“Oh, dear,” everybody at the
Institute said to everybody, “I’m sure I don’t know what ails the man. A lovely
wife and two lovely grown children and she had to tell him ‘either you go or I
go.’ And drinking! And this is rather
subtle, but it’s a well-known fact that neurotics seek out low company to
compensate for their guilt-feelings. The places
he frequents. Doctor Francis Bowman, the man who made space-flight a reality.
The man who put the Bomb Base on the Moon! Really, I’m sure I don’t know what
ails him.”
The hell with them all.
End
The cool space-bar image is a
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Thank you for reading.
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